The Anger Within

This poem is part of a series I have been writing about the legacy left behind after trauma, particularly sexual trauma.  If this resonates with you, I suggest also reading Flashback, The Name They Call Her, Shame, Further Musings on Shame, and What Every Woman Knows.


Strong emotion

Was not viewed favorably

When I was growing up.

It was always

Made clear to me

That I was:

Too loud

Too excitable

Too opinionated.

Too me,

I always thought.

 

I was always told

Not to be angry

About this

Or that

Or that other thing.

The list of things

That was acceptable

To be angry about

Was a very

Short list.

 

I internalized

From a very young age

That my anger, my rage

Was a fearsome thing

That should be contained

At all times.

When it erupted in my adolescence

As anger often does

I was reminded again

That it was to be subdued

Back into its cage

And kept under

Strict lock and key.

 

It is no surprise

That I entered adulthood

Believing that my rage

Should I ever allow it

To be fully unleashed

Would have the power

The suppressed energy

To level mountains

Boil the seas

Pull the earth

Out of its gravitational orbit

Destroy life as we know it

Some days

I still believe that.

 

 

 

3 thoughts on “The Anger Within

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s