My Neurological Nightmare

my head is broken

again

invisible pick axe

lodged over my right eye

brain compressed

in a vice grip

even my check bones ache

 

i avoid the bathroom mirror

the droop of my eyelid

disturbs me

although the neurologic

science behind this

fascinates me when I

am not in this haze of pain

 

the light burns

i cover my face like a vampire

avoiding certain fiery death

the world too bright

too sharp

too loud

too smelly

stomach in revolt

 

i cannot sleep

i cannot move

without risking the pick-axe

taking another swing

at my fragile skull

words are blurry

on my iPad screen

my thoughts are

fractured, fuzzy

 

my usual liquid mercury

brain is misfiring

i am not me

in these long hours

as crying is excruciating

i settle for rage

and petulance

 

migraine stealing my life

stealing my time

making me a prisoner

of my pain

of my dark cave of a bedroom

the ceiling fan and ice pack

my current best friends

this thief, this torturer

is not welcome here

but i appear helpless

to stop this brutal invasion

13 thoughts on “My Neurological Nightmare

  1. Sounds really painful. What a beautiful description though. You’ve turned it into art. And that’s powerful. Although I don’t suffer from migraines, there are many mornings which split my head into in front of the mirror. And I could relate all the more because of it.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’ll really felt that, I never had a migraine though a burst ear drum last year is the closest I may have come. Your description is so vivid, I hope you don’t suffer to long or to often with it.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Vanessa! Unfortunately they have been really frequent lately. I am learning mindfulness meditation to try to get a better handle of them but it is a process. Trying to capture the visceral experience felt like a piece of changing the narrative.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I really feel for you!! The only time I had something similar, was when I was waiting for my immigration interview for my permanent residency years ago! I’ll never forget it. I’m sad to hear they’ve been frequent. I’ll send a link to a meditation that helps me…um, it’s not conventional, but I love it…

        Like

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