I remember one of the events that occurred in the very first Christmas I can remember back to. I was short and chubby, wearing my little Dora p.j’s and holding my Big Brother Gabriel’s hand We stood by the tree when I asked him “Is Santa coming tonight? I want to be his best friend . . .” And to that, my Big Brother replied – “No Trinity, you can’t meet him. He’s got too many places to be and he’s got to do it in secret . . . or else people will think he’s breaking in and stealing like the Grinch!” I then remember tearing up and having to change into another nightgown, the red and white candy-cane-colored, scratchy cotton pajama. I remember going to sleep that very night listening to my brother read me numerous Christmas stories. I then woke the next morning – delighted to see that he’d visited and given me a cute stuffed animal which I kept until around age 12. I cherish the memory because all of it is gone and never again will peace rest at home. But the Christmas spirit is still real and lives in all our hearts today. I believed. And all the years until I began to grow up, I used to go around in my little scratchy gown thinking about Christmas and the memories it brought me. But now, 2018, I miss the little kind chubby girl I once was – the girl who dreamt Christmas dreams every year and wanted every toy I saw that I liked – I miss having the favorite color purple – because now it is blue, and the purple only lies within – from the memories I keep inside.
From the memories of Trinity Elizabeth Jasmine Shedd, Year 2003 to now. Remembrance is all it takes to smile.
P.s: I also remember the ceremonies at Christmas Mass and visiting my mom’s family, making Gingerbread houses homemade and things like that. The image is a picture of my first one.