swimming hard
against the current
in choppy
white surf
running barefoot
in cold wet sand
legs straining
aching
but afraid
to stop
to breathe
what demons
will catch  me
grasp my shoulders
roughly
with taloned claws
if I risk rest?
true danger
true threat
comes from within
not without
pangs of melancholy
steel gray clouds
move in quickly
become sleet
on exposed skin
when I invite silence
invite stillness
leave me clutching
my heart
with empty hands
futile effort
to protect
delicate tissue
from a thousand
stinging needles
of senseless longing
for a past I never had
future selves
I will never be

© 2017 Revised 2021 Christine Elizabeth Ray – All Rights Reserved