When I can’t sleep
I lay on the floor
and hang out with the monsters
under my bed
I finally introduced myself
after I got tired of them
poking me in the middle of the night
mustered my courage
took a peak
They are quite the motley crew
Vulnerability
resembles a giant porcupine
all razor sharp quills
shy gaze
caramel voice
She looks lovely
but it’s hard to get close enough
to really tell
Rage looks normal enough
as far as monsters go
but when he gets angry
which is often
his skin gets scaly
his eyes turn red
smoke starts to drift out
from his ears and nostrils
I find myself quite attracted to Rage
I want to stroke his reptilian skin
sit close to his heat
inhale his smoke
until my eyes burn red too
Invisibility is pretty quiet
mute actually
not so much invisible
as completely nondescript
I can never exactly remember what
Invisibility looks like
No matter how hard I try to look
my eyes slide right off
every time I visit Invisibility
it is like meeting for the first time
Memory is a giant messy yarn ball
pieces of barbed wire and broken glass
protruding out
mixed in with the occasional flower
and seaside picnic
Memory’s voice sounds like children laughing
Melissa Etheridge played in the dark
silent screams
heaving sobs
Hanging out with Memory is exhausting
Detachment does most of the talking
She wears a sharp suit
pantyhose
sensible pumps
tortoise shell glasses
she carries a laser pointer
used to illustrate her talking points
When I mention that I expected the monsters under my bed
to be Nightmare, Fear, Death
she shakes her head impatiently and tells me that those
are the monsters that haunt other people
the ones who have always lived in the light
who only have imagination to rely on
Those of us who have looked into the void
seen monsters wearing human faces
are a different story entirely
Hope looks like a sorority girl
at her five year college reunion
perfect make-up
well coiffed
just the right amount of accessories
dressed all in pink
tan
well-rested
always smiling
She could be squirting shoppers with perfume at Macy’s
she has a bright, breathy voice
always seems to be selling something
like a Club Med vacation in paradise
I don’t trust her
Not one little bit
Little Me is the smallest
she likes to climb on my lap
hold both my cheeks in her cherub hands
look deeply into my eyes
Hers are large
hazel
ancient
sad
weary
as though she has seen too much
Half the time I want to turn away
from those knowing eyes
the other half I want to hold her
comfort her
She mostly hums
and sighs
but once she looked at me with her
somber timeless eyes and said in her little girl voice
It wasn’t your fault. It was never your fault. You used to walk only in the light once too. Before. . .
It was hard to get back to sleep that night
I mused out loud one night as I grew drowsy
on the carpet
that I wondered which monster under my bed
was scariest
It was suddenly silent
I realized that they were all staring at me
some shocked
some concerned
Detachment pointed her laser pointer directly my chest
You, of course
The scariest monster under the bed
is the one you fear you will become
© 2017 Christine Elizabeth Ray – All rights Reserved
So memorable and eloquent.
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Thank you Lee.
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Love this and love Rage. That’s always my favorite, closest to my heart and who I am. Warm and cuddly. This is a wonderful poem. Truly wonderful.,
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I’m so glad it spoke to you.
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❤
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Oh my. I can relate.
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Thanks Sarah. I started to think about what would be under my bed and this quickly emerged
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Wow! This one makes you look inwards and really think! Loved it!
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Thank you. It is important to acknowledge our fears
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This blew my mind! Wow! Fantastic
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Thank you Allie– some writes are more cathartic than others
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❤
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So profoundly expressive. This left me with a quivering heart.
I’ve given names to those intangible feelings that I believe keep me going in life… instead leaving the other things of darker sides unnamed. But reading this I believe many of the ones you have named share those names with the ones that haunt me too. ❤
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I am glad this was so resonate for you Eric. It started off as just a fun writing exercise for me and then exploded with real truth. I was hoping that others would relate
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This is a masterpiece in its entirety.
Truth Zombie
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Thank you Truth Zombie. This digs deep
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