we are often just ships
passing by
during the frenetic work week
our sleep/wake cycles
not in sync
ruminating silently in the night hours
over our own individual worries
our daytime communication
focused on the logistics
of teenagers, bills, elderly dog
laundry, menu planning, the leaking sink
the busyness
forcing us to interact as
business partners
lazy saturday afternoon
the house is empty, quiet
except for the not so gentle snoring
of the dog we affectionately
call “darth jagger”
who can never bear
to be parted from you
his beloved alpha
this is when we
slip out of time
slip out of space
slip out of heavy
grown up roles
thrust onto us by the world
and the relentless marching
of time
it is in these weightless
formless hours
my head upon your shoulder
my hand resting gently
on your heart
your warm skin
pressed against
my warm skin
that I am most grounded
we are liquid warmth
quiet breath
our inhales
and exhales gradually
syncing
floating thoughts
thin line between
dozing and waking
i love the joining
of our bodies
in rising tide
but it is in this sacred
space of after
where the true meaning
of intimacy
reveals itself
a featherbed
of trust
safety
sensuous pleasure
welcome comfort
from a world
that increasing is chaotic
frightening
reshaping itself at
light speed
into something I no longer recognize
i am so grateful
that you welcome me
time and time again
into the circle
of your embrace
and offer me
this escape
this haven
for these precious hours
where we are renewed
This is so lovely, Christine. 💙
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Thank you Phoebe! My husband certainly liked it 😉 Still smiling to himself a little smugly I think. . .
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What a sweet tribute to your husband. I bet the ‘Kevin’ enjoyed this 😉
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He DID Olde Punk! He even chose the last line. Carving out this time together has been a big priority the last three or four months. Touch and words are much more my love languages than his but I think he has discovered a new appreciation for both.
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💞👏😳
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Lovely and lovingly put together, I wish I had more off these moments to.
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Kevin has been an unsung hero these last 10 months while my mood has been a roller coaster- he has kept our household afloat, literally saved Christmas and along with some good friends (and some very fine mental health professionals,) has kept me from falling into the abyss. I had been pretty stable the rest of our relationship (12 years) and this has been a challenging and I think scary experience for him at times. It is rare that I get the opportunity to publicly thank him and he is a pretty private guy, but he really appreciates the power of this kind of time together. We had to really work to prioritize making space for this reconnection but we have the advantage of having one child off at college and the sharing custody of the other with her bio dad.
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I’m glad you had someone there for you. Me and my wife are still having to work at it and we really need to prioritize our moments together. Hard to do when you have a 3 year old and physical and mental illness to deal with. Still I wouldn’t want it any other way, we’ll always be there for each other.
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3 year olds are forces of nature! good luck
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Ha ha, yep. She’s a whirlwind but a bright spark to. 🙂
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Once again, you capture my heart’s desire. So few are lucky enough to have this haven. Good for you and your husband. Lovely. I get the whole thing about needing a lot of support. It’s been on if those years (last year) for sure.
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We were pretty distant there for quite some time and it took a lot for me to tell him I was in trouble and that we might have been in trouble. It has taken a lot of work on both our parts to get to this current place. As you are aware, long-term relationships can be very cyclical and it can be surprisingly easy to drift away from each other. Some very wise women (who were HAPPY to kick me in the ass!) reminded me that I couldn’t chose how he responded to me but that I had a lot of choice in how I reached out and responded to him.
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That’s excellent advice. So glad you two can reconnect and have this together, and support. It’s priceless in a good relationship.
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It is indeed. Particularly one you want to last.
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Oh, Christine, you touch my heart! This is so beautifully written!!
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Thank you Dorinda! One of those deeply personal but deeply universal posts. My husband tells me that secretly most men cherish those moments of intimacy as much as women do.
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I believe he’s right 😉
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I have to chime in here. Yes, I whole heartedly need an intimate, sacred place. Sex and intimacy is just a basic term for it, to me. I deeply crave, and for a little while, found that deep, comfortable contentment that trancends just making love and intimacy. It truly is restoring and i would never settle for less ever again. Sometimes people don’t know this until they’ve found it.
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Thank you for providing some deeply needed perspective Mark. I am embarrassed to admit that it simply never had occurred to me until my first encounter with my husband that men bring as many insecurities and needs to bed that women do. He was the first man who was ever open with me about what vulnerable experience it was.
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Wonderful, Mark! So glad you chimed in. I appreciate the your point of view. My husband and I share the same 🙂
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It took most of my adult life to figure that out. The right relationship makes a world of difference.
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indeed. The “right” relationship seems to be trifecta of person, timing and ability to communicate and pursue what you need and want at the time.
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My goodness, what a gorgeous tribute to your husband and your love. Thank you so much for sharing!
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Thank you Vanessa!
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